Bridesmaids. Another headache??

I am very close to my Mom. She’s my best friend, ever. So while I’m trying to pick my bridesmaids and maid of honor I’m a little stumped. I have my three best friends from different stages of my life and my beautiful baby sister… If I could have five I would but I think four is a respectable number… I REALLY don’t want a massive wedding party. I want those near and dear to me to be my backup and save my butt from all the things that go on before, during and after a wedding.

Trying to pick my maid of honor… It’s like trying to pick an all time favorite video game. While my sister is my sister… She’s my sister… I can’t think of any other way to put that. I don’t have to give her a title to show her how much she means to me… She’s stuck with me for longer then any man or child will be! My sister is like the SNES, always with me, always on my mind and we have memories I wouldn’t trade for the world. She’s taken for granted because she was with me first, but I wouldn’t have any relationship be the way it is now without her… Just like the SNES I wouldn’t be the gamer today without it. But like the SNES she knows how much she means and takes it all quietly knowing how important she is to me.

And I wouldn’t want to have her plan my bachelorette party. That’s like giving SNES a CD and asking it to play it… My sister and I are just completely different in style… She’d do a GREAT job… But… She’s my sister… I trust her as much as I can throw her.

Trying to pick one person who means the most to me (other then Logan and The Padawan) just isn’t fair. Not when it’s trying to get me to choose between friends. I would rather cut my own arm off then hurt any one of the ladies I want in my wedding party. But putting the thought into it made me realize something.

I want my Mom to be my Matron of Honor. When I think of all the women in my life who mean something to me she’s at the top of my list. She’s my best friend, my rock, just… My everything. There is no one else I would want to have standing beside me on my wedding day.

I asked her if it would be weird to have her stand in that role and apparently it is. I explained my logic and I think it really touched her but she’s right, no one else would really get it.

My daughters God Mother is one of the other bridesmaids I will have in my wedding party… Of course the other runner up for God Mother is as well… To me it’s not fair to have her be my Maid of Honor, God Mother and… Just everything. We’ve known each other since the first grade and I love her to bits! But how to choose???

My other reason for wanting my Mom to be my Maid of Honor is I trust her to have everything set up the way I want it. She knows me, my sense of humor and everything else to have the perfect shower set up, the perfect Bachelorette party done up and can keep up with us gals.

I guess I’ll figure it out… I will have to for sure eventually… But this is probably the hardest part of planning or even doing research into a wedding. How to decide who is your best friend? Just because you pick someone as your MoH doesn’t mean they are more to you then anyone else… But people always assume things. My girls are my best friends like I said from different parts of my life. Each one has seen me through some tough spots once, twice or even more. If I could call them all my MoH I would. But I want a traditional wedding party… I want it all. I want a father daughter dance which won’t include myself if it happens, I want it to be normal.

For once in my life I want a tiny slice of normalcy to fill up the complete chaos that is and has been my life.

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